Upto the previous postings, the topics and the contents were as I planned earlier, to share with all of you through this blog.
But the present one and onwards, regarding my Delhi life and IR feelings, frankly speaking, I was in dilemma, “what to say big about that all these?”
Indeed, I saw a lot of articles and sharing of feelings by my fellow IR fans who are away from their homeland, all expressed one solid thing i.e. about the carrying of IR memories and songs with them wherever they went which makes them alive in their mind all time, wherever they are and whatever situation they are !
How true these feelings are!
In fact, during one of the Thiruvasagam related interviews IR also expressed his emotional moments when one of his fans, who was away in farther land, told about his own feelings that how IR is considered as above even family members in such situation!
My feelings were / are no different than that!
When I read all these I also become nostalgic! Present postings are results of such nostalgic recollections only. I hope readers will understand my feelings and certainly don’t consider these postings (on IR moments) as an autobiography.
My aim is to make people who read this, can compare their situation also with that of mine!
They may also be attempting all these, which I attempted, and find a solace, happiness, some determination to pursue IR dreams which I cannot complete!
When I left for Delhi in February 1985, I had nothing to carry, except the thoughts and feelings of my family and of course IR!
When you travel for a distant land of unfamiliar demographic background, what remain in you is only emptiness! Everything you decide to face “as-and-when-it-arise” basis! Particularly, in those period when PC and email were not dreamt of you are left alone and removed from your past world!
So what to say, except reminding myself the song “Idhayam Pogudhe…..!”
But after landing at Delhi, by God’s grace, certain fortunate unexpected things happened to me, when it was least expected!
My first boss was from TamilNadu, which gave me some comfort at Office situation.
Again, when I was standing on a street looking for a room to stay in Karol Bagh, I met my ex-school mate (after he left my school more than a decade ago!) In fact he identified me, and he introduced with another friend who is also from my school and my village!
What else one need! I took immediate decision to stay in Karol Bagh itself, in a dormitary type of arrangement next to my friend’s place!
Within few weeks, when I was returning to my room after office, while crossing my friends house, the first Tamil song I heard at Delhi came from inside his house!
The shrill sound of a new voice at full throat “Andha Nilava thaan naan kayila pudichen..!” I just died in that moment!
I just stood in the road stunningly and started listening with rapt attention and tears flowing in my eyes! While the violin pieces confirmed that’s indeed from IR, I got further confirmation with IR’s voice itself that followed! The new voice I came to know as Chitra later, even though I didn’t like that initially, as I was so used to Janaki and others!
My friend who saw me standing outside his house, got surprised and took me inside. The song was coming from another room where his other friends were staying. And soon I got introduced to his other friends also, all of them were working in Telecom department like him. A normal tape recorder with the new arrivals of cassettes on that particular day, gave me the oxygen I needed most!
Then onwards, that place found me most of the time of my weekends and holidays! Though they were not the typical IR fans, but their collection contained reasonable IR cassettes!
Though, I could realize that I am like a parasite sticking to them, for “certain” matters I was ( and had to be) beyond all those “reasons & feelings”!
In fact they were so kind and I could develop reasonable friendships with them also (strategically)! But I never disclosed my IR fanaticism to them!
Slowly, this arrangement helped me in certain other things also! I was introduced to Theatres at Delhi (like Kamal, Liberty etc) which screened once in a while Tamil films !
I still remember the emotionally choked moments when I first hear the title music of “Kaaki Chattai”, the very first film I saw in Delhi’s Kamal theatre ( a Kamal film in Kamal theatre!).
Later on the list grew more with Mouna Ragam, Sindhu Bairavi etc etc. Years later, I even became the member of the Delhi Tamil Film society.
Similarly, for the video shows arranged on holidays by these friends (sometime covering marathon two days also) I was also invited and I could continue to see IR films, as and when those were released ! As already explained earlier, I used to record the re-recordings of these films.
In short, what I could realize that, "I am not going to be deprived of my IR links, thoughts and memories etc, even at this far away land! "
But I was not going to be content with just the IR films and videos and cassettes!
I have to do something more, that’s about my dream of learning WCM ! To understand more about IR!
Without clear cut method or approach, I still continued to try to collect some information on such feasibility of learning WCM at Delhi!
That day also came soon!